Are You Doing What You Most Want? by Carl Stewart


energy (Photo credit: Sean MacEntee)

Guest Post by Carl Stewart, IAPLC member


“This is your life. Do what you want and do it often. . . .
Life is about the people you meet and the things you create with
them, so go out, and start creating. Life is short, live your dream,
and wear your passion.”

Are you doing what you most want to be doing? What you would truly love to do?

Yes? Great.


The obvious next question might be “why not?”

And the answers might be something such as:

“I don’t know how.”

“I don’t have the funding.”

“I don’t have the confidence.”

Or, “I’m scared. I’m afraid I’d fail.”

Well, if you do not do it, you, will fail anyway, so why not give it a

How You Structure You Answer Guides Your Action 

First, let me help you with how you structure your answer to
“why not?”

If you structure your answer using the stem, “Yes, I want to do it, but…” and then add your reasons for not doing it, you kinda shoot yourself in the foot.

The “Yeah, but…” approach has no energy. Oh, yes, it starts with energy from the “yeah” but the “but” butts it out. It negates that initial energy and desire.

However, if you change “but” to “and” a remarkable thing happens.

The “and” conjoins your desire–“Yeah, I want to do…”–with your reality, “I don’t know how. I’m afraid of failing.” “And” not only keeps the initial energy, using it adds energy by creating a gap between desire and reality that generates a creative tension.

It is kind of like stretching a big rubber band between your desire and your reality. There is energy in that stretched rubber band that you can use to take action, learn, and craft your result.

That energy–and the framework of creative tension–helps you do what you most want to do — even if you are scared, or don’t know how to do it, yet.

When you hold your desire (vision) and reality in mind together with an “and” it almost automatically leads to action.

“Yeah, I want to do… and I don’t know how to do it, yet–so how should I proceed. What should I do first?

Structure Affects Energy, Action, and Results
Yeah, but… negates your energy and defeats your purpose.

Yeah and … increases your energy and leads you into action.

If you start small and scale up, fear and failing are less of an obstacle. Failing gives you feedback. Fear, or rather, caution, keeps you honest.

Together, they help you learn from your mistakes and experience and systematically learn how to do what you most want to do — with whatever you have to start with.

Go For What You Truly Want — And Reap the Rewards

Go for what you want and embrace where you are, what you have, and what you can do. Using the energy of motivation (from the “yeah”) and creative tension (from the gap between vision and reality) you can teach yourself how to do what you want.

And as you do, a third and powerful of energy will kick in — momentum — and carry you through to completion of what matters to you.

Then you do it again. Create something else you truly want. And again, until you are doing and creating what you want most want.

So go for it!

Not to do (or at least start to do) what you most want is the most dangerous risk you can take.

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